I was rudely awakened this morning by an extraordinarily loud buzzing noise (WAV file, 89 KB) outside my house. It turns out my neighbor decided it was a good morning to shorten a pine that stood tall in his yard.
The piece of equipment pictured is what’s responsible for the noise. It’s hard to make out in the picture, but the words “WHISPER CHIPPER” are blazoned across this technological marvel. That’s the kind of name that could only be invented by out-of-touch marketing flacks. Could they concentrate on the chipper’s real positive qualities, like the fact it can reduce tree parts to fine dust in the blink of an eye? No, they decided to concentrate on how quiet the product is, despite the fact that, while idling, it sounds like a hive of angry forty-foot-long wasps.
I need to get some coffee now. And earplugs. Definitely earplugs.
2 Comments
Sounds like my office. They’ve been redoing the carpets, elevators, and other things to our building for most of this year.
This morning (around 7:30am) I hit the “Print” button so I could give a hard copy of a document ot my boss. The workers downstairs had perfect timing to start using an electric sander right as my printer started up. The ensuing “BRRRRROOOWWWRRRRTTT!!!” noise that came from directly below my printer gave me a minor heart attack. Hopefully, I’ll never hear a real printer make that kind of noise. Ye Gods!
The real pisser about having interior work done on the floor beneath you is that it sounds like the floor is being cut out from underneath you a la old school Warner Brothers Cartoons with a handsaw. Especially when the floor vibrates! Gah!
I’ve heard that a sticky substance like chewing gum makes heavy machinery live up to it’s quiet name. You might want to give that a shot if you’re in a vindictive mood. ;P
WHISPER CHIPPER MEANS THAT MOST IKELY THAT EVERYTHING THAT YOU HEAR AFTER USING THIS UNIT SOUNDS LIKE A WHISPER! EAR PROTECTION IS A MUST ! OH! FOR ANYONE WITHIN A 100 YARDS TOO!
I HAVE ONE OF THESE I BOUGHT JUST TO GET 40 ACRES OF PROPERTY CLEANED UP AFTER SELECT CUTTING WAS DONE. SOUNDS LIKE THE DISTANT NEIGHHBORS WILL BE CALLING ME. DON’T KNOW WHAT THO!!